Never Say Never

Random things I never thought would ever have to come out of my mouth:

1. No I can not get you ice cream from the ice cream man, the light is about to change.

2. You do NOT throw away money, ever!

3. How did you get a poptart stuck in your hair?

4. Diaper cream does not go on your face!

5. No you're right, we don't eat poop.

6. Don't make me email your daddy!

7. Can you sell children on Ebay?

8. Get your finger out of your nose... ewww... don't eat your boogers.

9. Why are there teeth marks in my "toy"?

10. Bring him here so I can smell his butt.

11. JUST GIVE ME THE DRUGS!!!

12. You do not play Goblin King with your brother.

13. DVD's are NOT frisbees.

14. If you don't stop that I'm going to duct tape you to the wall.

15. I don't care if you dip your apples in honey mustard.


Random things I never thought my kids would say at age...

6 mths: Mamamamamamamama

1 1/2: S-T-O-P STOP!!!

2 1/2 yrs: I got a big butt! You got big boobs!

3 1/2 yrs: Yes you f*%$'n did!

4 1/2 yrs: Let me see your boobs.

5 1/2 yrs: I hate my life!

6 1/2 yrs: HEY! Stop kissing my boyfriend!