My sister woke me up early in the morning to tell me that my grandma had passed away. She always hated tax day. I remember being void of all emotion. I was frozen. There is only one person that could tell you how I looked, how I acted, how I reacted. He was the only one by my side through it all and he has probably blocked as much of that painful week as I have.
We had to be at the hospital at 10am. I don't remember driving there, or arriving, or getting situated. My memories of this day come in spurts. The nurses pumped me full of drugs on my doctor's orders. I'm guessing they used pitocin to start labor and the morphine they gave me pretty much knocked me out.
From what I remember I was in and out of consciousness. My aunt Kelly and my aunt Sherry (R.I.P.) came to visit me in the hospital. I am sure my mom came up at some point but she didn't stay long. My soon to be mother-in-law stayed the whole time, as did my fiance'. They both stayed by my side. We made room on the tiny bed for him and she pushed my hair back off my forehead, comforting me in my time of need. I had never felt more love in one room. Of this whole ordeal, that moment brings a smile to my face. Knowing that that was the kind of family I was going to marry into.
The day remains a blur and I slept most of the night thanks to the drugs.
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3 comments:
Bri, I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine how difficult that must have been for you, and still is. Thank you for sharing your story.
I'm so glad that you have memories of people loving you so much through such painful time.
I'm so happy that those things are what you remember. It's amazing how our minds block out things that are too painful in order to protect us from it later on.
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