That's For Girls, or So They Say

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about what society deems acceptable for girls and what is acceptable for boys. I came across a post not too long ago where the author highlighted products that were geared toward an individual gender. The author made statements like, "Because who wants to use a plain black microscope? No, it must be pink." The comments were very sarcastic in tone, and sexist in nature. Since actual tone cannot be conveyed properly in text form, I can only assume that the whole thing was more tongue in cheek than totally serious but it kind of struck a nerve with me. The more I thought about the subject of the article, the more I realized how much society relies on a double standard.

The reason there are different colored items for girls and boys is because that is what society has had engrained in them for so long. Pink is for girls, and blue is for boys. When shopping for a little girl we buy her Barbie dolls, princess clothes, and sparkly shoes. When shopping for a little boy we automatically gravitate towards superheroes, cowboy boots, and matchbox cars.

When I was younger there was no such thing as a girl liking boy stuff just because she liked that stuff. No, she was labeled a tomboy by society. She wasn't just a girl that liked the same things that boys like. She was different. As for boys, heaven forbid a boy liked anything "girly" back then. Boys are supposed to be masculine, and tough, and if a little boy even cried he was called a sissy. So, for as long as I can remember there has been this invisible line that seperates girly stuff from boy stuff.

Today, this line has become quite blurred though. The girls of today's generations are being told they can be anything they want to be. They are told they can do anything they want to do. They are lifted up day in and day out with encouraging words of strength. They are believing that they are just as good, if not better, as boys in anything and everything from school smarts to athletics, from the business world to the kitchen. Girls can do it all, and sometimes they really do. The same cannot be said for boys though. There is still a stigma that is hanging around that boys cannot do anything girly. Not everyone looks down their nose at boys/men that aspire to be dancers, gymnasts, or stay at home dads but there is still this notion that men need to be manly, and somehow these things are not manly.

When it comes to clothing choices, girls have such a wide range of options from different colors to different textures. Girls get all the cute stuff while boys are left with basketball shorts and boring teeshirts. Granted, this is all for your average working class family... if you've got the money for high end boutiques then there are plenty of cute boy clothes but that also brings it's own stigma which I will get to shortly. Anyway, so girls are given all of these clothing options, not to mention accessories and shoes to go with them. Girls are still being subconciously told they need to be pretty to be accepted, that they need to dress in cute clothes to impress a boy, or their neighbors, or one-up their arch nemesis. Boys are having it shoved down their throats that all that matters is comfort and sports. Look at all the teeshirts in the boy's section and they mention having swag, shooting hoops, owning the field, or having mad ninja skills. It's all about being the tough guy. Think about that the next time you are shopping with your kids, then think about what you and others think of little boys dressed in their button down shirts and skinny jeans and pink Converse. I'm willing to bet that if this was a 2 year old you would think it was cute, only after your initial reaction of "pink is a girl's color" but if this were a teen boy you're thought process would be a little different. Now, I am not saying everyone jumps to this same conclusion but the fact of the matter... it's still there. The thought that the way someone dresses can affect their sexuality is plain ridiculous. A color is a color is a color. Dressing nice is dressing nice is dressing nice. All genders should have the opportunity to wear what makes them happy regardless of the color or the glitter or the casualness of it.

Girls are so constantly told they can like whatever they want. Girls go see the Avengers movies dressed as their favorite superhero. Girls dress their Build a Bear up as Darth Vader and run around the house with their own personal lightsaber that they got for Christmas. Girls can have Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle birthday parties and play soccer on the boy's team. Girls can wear basketball shorts and grungy teeshirts and are no longer called tomboys... think about that, when is the last time someone referred to a girl as anything other than a girl? Now think about the last time a boy was picked on or talked about or judged based on the color he likes, the shows he watches, the sports he doesn't play... double standard, no?

When a little boy plays with a baby doll, or pushes a stroller while wearing high heels and carrying a purse, the first thing everyone thinks is, "something is wrong with this picture." In all honestly, the only thing wrong is that you think there is something wrong. A toy is a toy whether the kid is 2 or 12. Girls don't have to worry about the things they like. A boy can't like My Little Pony or Barbies because someone might think he is gay, or call him a sissy, or worse, hurt him for liking those things. My boys can like pink and purple and My Little Pony and aspire to be ballet dancers if that is what they want. I won't worry about whether they are gay or straight or not manly enough because in my eyes they are just who they are meant to be. No one should take away their right to express themselves in the way they see fit. No one should be shoving down their throat that if they cry they are a sissy, or if they become a stay at home dad they aren't man enough.

I hope one day we can erase this stigma and completely obliterated that shady line between what is boy appropriate and what isn't. If a girl can do and be anything she wants, so can a boy. We complain all the time about men not being sensitive enough... well guess who is to blame? We are. We are to blame for telling boys they need to be manly, and strong, and never cry because crying is for sissies and girls are sissies. We all know that isn't true about girls anymore. We are tough little birds so why can't we believe that boys can be more sensitive if we just stopped feeding them "Wheaties Logic."

I will leave you with this final thought... if your daughter wanted a Spiderman bike, would you think twice about buying it for her? Now, what if your son wanted a pink sparkly bike? I'll be honest, if my son asked for a pink bike I would ask if he was sure that was what he wanted and let him know that not everyone would agree with his choice but I would probably do the same for my girls.

New Posts Coming Soon

Again, I have gone MIA. I explained in my last post about why I haven't been around much but lately I have had a lot on my mind and you are all going to hear about it soon.

Coming up on my blog, look for posts titled The Entitled Generation, The End of A Homeschool Year, Equality: Not What You Think it Means, and more! Life is changing for us and that will all come out on my blog as it happens. Right now we don't know much so I don't have much to say. But I do want to address some bigger world/social issues since they have been on my mind lately. As a warning, they may offend you but here on Such is My Life, I say what I want and it is only my opinion and generally not an attack on anyone or anything.

Hope you stick around to read up on what I have to share :)

Life Gets in the Way

Sometimes life just seems to run me down and prevent me from being able to find the words for my blog. That has been my last month.

On March 31st, we received some news about my husband's future in the Army and it wasn't good. The Board of Inquiry recommended elimination. It still has to go to the Board of Review and then the Secretary of the Army but chances are slim to none that they reverse the decision. We've been given a 3-5 month timeline for the final decision. AKA time to pack up and head home. That has made for a rough month in our house. He is the sole bread winner and I manage the household finances so I am freaking out just a bit.

Aside from that, soccer season has been winding down. With that comes potlucks, and planning, and trophies, and pictures, and gifts for coaches. Jacob finished a couple of weeks ago after a less than organized season. They fought a hard battle but couldn't manage to pull out of a second win this season. Kadie's team played exceptionally well together and we all had a lot of fun as a team. It has been one of the best parent involved teams I have been a part of since we moved here. It was refreshing to have so many caring parents involved. The team finished out the season with a tie, making their record 7-1-2. It was a good, solid run for our u10 girls. The only team they lost to, was also the team they tied twice. The girls fought really hard in this last game but it was some of the worst refereeing we had ever experienced. Very one sided calling and some of the most ridiculous calls. The final score was 1-1 so at least we didn't lose but it was a very frustrating game due to the officiating. Kadie didn't score this game but she did score a good majority of her games this season, sometimes multiple times in a game. Her team may be going to a tournament in July, that should be fun and exciting for them.

Adam's team also had his last game yesterday. I made cupcakes for both his and Kadie's potlucks... Jacob's too (the week before). I never think about the heat and them sitting out in the sun while we wait for the games to finish... especially when we have to be out there all day. I managed to keep them from melting into blobs though. I put Kadie's on ice in the cooler but I forgot to plug up the cooler so all the ice melted onto the backseat of my car, dripped down onto the floor, and out through the bottom of my car. Good thing I have leather seats so they are easy to dry LoL Anyway, Adam's team almost went undeafeated this season. They won 9 games and lost 1. The team they lost to they ended up annihalating last weekend at Springfest. Adam scored at almost every game this season. At Springfest he scored three times in the 2nd quarter alone! Coach calls him his secret weapon cause he is little and fast and he loves to play goalie. He is one of those goalies that will come out of the box to kick to the ball. He cannot just stand in the box and wait. He has to charge the ball... which is probably one of the reason Coach calls him Rhino. The other reason being he would wear a pony tail right in the front of his head like a horn to keep the hair out of his eyes while he played. After the win at Springfest, Coach joked that everyone was shaving their head... Adam decided he was down for that and opted for a fauxhawk. He looks so much older now and everyone loved his hair.

Sara still has a couple more games left and then we will be ending her season, leaving us with just one more season which just started. The u14 girls just started three weeks ago. They won their first game and lost their following two games when they were playing down players. They should have 11 players on the field but they regularly play with 7 or 9. This last game they actually went into the 4th quarter tied 2-2 while they played 4 players down. They ended up losing but it sounds like it was a hard fought game. Lexi ended up reffing a game yesterday and then her game was cancelled due to lack of available players so she didn't get to play. She is begging to play club soccer and I wish I could tell her yes. At this point I just cannot commit to anything costly, and with moving soon I don't want to sign her up for club here and then have to pull her from the team. I really wish the girls that sign up for the rec leagues took it as seriously as she does. It really isn't fair to her. Hopefully the season gets better but if any of the previous seasons are an indication... it will only go further downhill from here.

And on top of all of that stuff... I ran my first 10k! I did it in 1hr and 15min. I did stop to walk for maybe 30 seconds to a minute but I ran the whole damn thing other than that! I was really proud of myself for not dying. Then I did something stupid... I signed up for a half marathon May 24th and the day after I did, I came down with a horrible cold which has kept me from doing much of anything all week. Now I need to run an unprepared 7 miles today (still feeling a bit under the weather) so I can get myself on track for running 13.1 in 5 weeks. I really don't know what I was thinking when I signed myself and my husband up for this thing. LOL

Anyway, that has pretty much been my life in a nutshell over the last month. Bad news, soccer, running, and sickness. It makes for one tired mama, and one stressed wife <- anything="" back="" but="" by="" can="" come="" get="" hope="" i="" if="" is="" manage="" more="" p="" person="" regularly="" s="" same="" say="" soon...="" that="" the="" to="" up="" way="" with="" writing="">

Teen Boys

They say teen girls are worse than teen boys. Girls are moody, tempermental, they get their periods, they can get pregnant, they like boys, they are just weird. Well, let me tell you, I would raise a thousand girls if I didn't have to raise any teen boys. 

I can handle the periods, and the mood swings, and the attitude, and the hormones, and the liking boys. But boys, boys are disgusting! There are layers upon layers of disgusting that comes with teen boys. 

I'm not talking the pick your nose and eat your boogers kind of disgusting. I'm not talking about the gunk between their toes grossness. I'm not talking about the belching and the farting, either... believe me, my boys don't hold a candle to my girls when it comes to those bodily functions. 

I am talking about the lack of showering. They promise to shower in the morning but they don't get up on time and end up running out the door in the clothes they slept in. They forget to brush their teeth. They forget to put on deodorant. They forget to put socks on. They come home and they just stink to high heavens. No amount of body spray will even cover it up. Then they still have to practically be forced to get in the shower. The next step would be hosing them down in the backyard because every inch of their body is growing something nasty and it's going straight to my nose. 

I am talking about the food they stuff in their faces. It doesn't matter what it looks like. It doesn't matter how old it is. It can be slathered in 12 different condiments, have bee dropped on the floor, and left out all night and they would still eat it. No concoction is off limits. If it's food, it's edible. And then they shovel it in their mouths like they haven't eaten in months. They are worse than toddlers at lunch time. 

Then there is the most disgusting thing of all. I am talking about the changes. The puberty changes. The hormones. The obsession with sex. They figure out what happens when Willy gets hard. They figure out what to do about it. They want to know how to do other things and it's disgusting. As adults, we just see it as normal, every day kind of stuff. And when we were younger sex wasn't as easy to come by. If we wanted to be naughty we had to find our parent's porn magazine stash under their beds or their dirty dice in their closets. Now, all teens have to do is turn on the computer and search for nude pictures and sex videos. We can even turn on all the parental settings but these disgusting, albeit smart, boys will find a way around that. Did you know you can still find bikini and underwear models via Google with all the parental settings turned on? Yeah, I found that out the hard way. 

So yeah, boys are gross. Girls might be moody and like these disgusting boys but give me a teen girl over a teen boy any day. I can handle that. I can even handle little boys that like to dig for worms and shove beads up their noses. I cannot handle my precious baby boy going through those hormonal changes, though. Give me the dirty little boy back, not the dirty teen that lives under my roof now. 

Teach, Learn, Reteach, Relearn

Homeschooling can be fun. It can also be tedious and stressful. Most of our days are the latter.

I would really like to be that well put together homeschool mom that can teach 12 subjects involving art and cooking and visits to the museum to six kids and enjoy every minute of it. Unfortunately, that just isn't me.

I homeschool one third grade boy and he drives me absolutely batty. Every day we have to do work he whines about it. He hates writing. He hates reading. He hates math. It's a battle to get him to just sit still and do his work so I can be sure he is learning the things he needs to in order to take a state assessment that is coming up soon. The assessment that will determine whether he is learning enough at home to keep me out of trouble.

It seems that every other day I have to reteach him skills he has already known for months. I have to constantly direct, and redirect, him on the process to take when trying to find an answer. This is especially true for math.

He flew through the numbers and numeration portion of his math workbook. He aced the test for that, too. Then we moved into operations. He flew through the workbook and when we took the test on it, he failed miserably. Even though he knew how to do the work when it came to doing it in the workbook, he couldn't seem to remember any of it for the test. Or he just wasn't thinking it through and reading the directions properly. Questions like, "Joe had a photo album with 4 pages. Each page holds 3 pictures. How many pictures does the photo album hold?" and he knows how to do those kinds of problems, yet he would answer 7. He saw the 4 and the 3 and immediately went to addition for the answer. I made him retake the test, twice! He finally did well enough that I felt we could move on.

We stuck with fast math for awhile. Working on playing card addition, subtraction, and multiplication. We did a lot of fast math online on xtramath, and we did a variety of lessons on Khan Academy. He was doing very well with all of it, so we moved onto the geometry section of his math workbook.

He is flying through that, just like the other sections but now the simplest of tasks he cannot remember. Working on Khan Academy today he read the question is 497+58= but then kept telling me he had to take away numbers because you can't do 7 and 8. Even though he read the question, he was thinking he needed to do subtraction. Then when he was doing a perimeter question, something we have gone over quite often with me telling him "you walk around the outside" in order to find the perimeter of an object but he "didn't remember."

The whole reason I pulled him out of school in the first place was because he was coming home from school "forgetting" everything his teacher taught him so I was having to reteach him in my own way. That seemed to frustrate him more. We would spend hours in the evening stressing each other out because I did not have time to teach him things he should already know.

You all know I am a busy mom. I have 5 kids to take care of, a household to run, soccer practices, soccer games, etc etc etc. It didn't make sense to send him to school just to come home and not know anything. I figured the best option was just teaching him myself. Which I feel like I am doing a good job... about 1/3 of the time. The rest of the time is spent wondering who can teach him better. Does he need to go back to school? Am I doing him any kind of service by keeping him home? Is the stress worth it? Will he eventually catch on? Am I enabling him to not have to remember because I sit and help him each day?

He has to take this state assessment coming up and I am worried that he won't know what to do. We took some practice tests the other day and I have got to say, I hated them. The questions seemed too abstract for third graders. Math shouldn't be that difficult. The reading portion seemed too indepth. The questions used wording that made it confusing to use the text to find the answer. I worry about what the results of the test will say about me as the sole provider of information for him.

Then again, what is the worst that can happen? They tell me he has to go back to school? I hope to send him back next year anyway. But for now, I will teach and reteach and hope that one day he just learns and doesn't have to relearn every couple of days.

Get It Done

I recently signed up for my first 10K! The most I have ran at all is under 5 miles so I am not sure how I will do but I am hoping to run the entire race.

The race is a week from Saturday and I haven't been doing enough running. Most days I get in about 3 miles, if I am feeling up to getting out and hitting the pavement. I did do 4 straight miles last week though and felt pretty good about it.

I ran 3 on Monday... or maybe it was only two... I don't remember and don't feel like checking at the moment since my phone (where my app is) is on the charger. Oh wait, I can check Facebook, since I posted it there. Yep! 3.05 miles! It was a good run, and I even posted a "poem" while I was running... cause I am silly like that. You can check that out on my other blog, http://youre-a-poet.blogspot.com/ if you are so inclined.

Anyway, my legs have been really sore since then. I'm not quite sure why, though. I stretched plenty so maybe I haven't been drinking enough water. The weird part was that it was my inner thighs that were sore. That part of my legs has never gotten sore from running before and my thighs are my most disliked feature... so it was a good thing and a bad thing that they were sore.

It was bad because I did not feel like running yesterday, so instead I did 50 squats, 50 crunches, and 2 twenty second elbow planks. My hubby was a sweetheart and rubbed my thighs before we went to bed... no strings attached. He actually said he thought I might have been "lying" about where my legs were sore because I wanted to get lucky but he was too tired. I laughed because I thought he offered to rub my legs because he wanted to get lucky but I was too tired LOL Needless to say, no one got lucky last night.

On the upside, my legs were feeling better this morning. My son, that I homeschool, had a question in regards to how fast someone would run a mile in his math workbook and while the answer is dependent on the person, the correct answer was 15 minutes. He didn't believe me that 15 minutes for a mile was even an option because a mile seems so long to him. So after he finished his work I decided we would go out and see how fast he could run one mile. We left the house, ran for quarter of a mile, came back, and then did it again so we could hit 1 mile. He was shocked to see his time was 10 minutes and 34 seconds. He was pretty tired, even though he runs faster and harder than that on the soccer field, but I was proud that he didn't give up on the run. I then went back out and did another 1.2 miles after we got back home and while I would have liked to have made it a longer run, it was really hot this morning. I do much better with my pace and distance if I can start right after the sun comes up or as the sun is going down. Running any other time here in Hawaii is just a killer, especially for someone that doesn't like the heat. The other upside to my legs hurting is that it means my thighs are getting a much needed workout. Maybe I can eventually start to like my thighs... but I doubt it.

As for my diet... it's going very well, if I do say so myself. I started this new lifestyle back on January 19th weighing in at 144lbs. While that's not terrible, it is really close to the high end for my height (not quite 5'5" but we go with 5'5" because we round up around here). Just over two months later I am down over 10lbs. This morning I weighed in at 133.8lbs. Yes, it's taking some time, but the weight is coming off and I am eating healthier thanks to counting my calories and avoiding fast food as much as possible.

I am only 4lbs away from my goal weight! You know, the weight the DMV thinks I weigh? Yep! Only 4 more pounds to go and I will be under 130! Then will come a new challenge... maintaining that weight! If I can stay between 125 and 129, I will be one happy girl! I haven't seen anything under 130 since I was working 5 years ago at the portrait studio. Being on my feet all day for long hours all day Saturday and Sunday kept me from eating out or eating junk on the weekends. During the week it was easy to eat healthier meals because I was cooking almost every night for my family. It really is important to cook wholesome homecooked meals but man, as a busy mom of 5 kids, all of which play soccer so I am shuttling kids almost every night to one practice or another, it gets hard to cook well balanced meals for the family.

I know there are going to be people out there that say, "Oh, I cook every night! My kids eat a full meal three times a day and it's cooked by me! You think you are busy? We have dance, and gymnastics, and piano, and soccer, and swimming, and that's just for one of my six kids yet I can do it, so can you." Ehhh, what I say is... Good for you! I wish I was that well organized... sadly, I am not. I'm just not the supermom that I claim to be and you know what, that's ok. My kids are healthy, I am healthy, I get some me time during my running, we are busy, we eat Poptarts and Ramen on the go sometimes, and we are happy. It is working for us right now. One day I may not be running around like a chicken with her head cut off and one day soon {read: when soccer season ends} I will get back to cooking more often. For now, though, this is how we get it done.

So yay me! I am working on me, and my kids are enjoying their cereal dinners before rushing out to soccer. I bet they won't look back on their childhood and complain that I force fed them granola bars and frozen gogurt as we were running out the door, and I also bet they won't complain that mom only cooked full meals on occasion. Chances are they will only look back and think, "My mom was a rockstar!" HA! Okay, but I can dream, can't I?

Soccer 3-14

The kids are on spring break this week so I haven't gotten a chance to post soccer updates. Let's see if I can remember everything.

It was a late morning for us with no ref duty and our first game at 1030am. Kadie's Bombers played one of their best games yet. The passing was great. The defense was great. We only let the other team score once. The coach's daughter scored her first goal and it was amazing. A nice lob right over the goalie! My husband even got a picture of it while I was line reffing. So I lied, I did have to ref but that was because we didn't have any referees. Five different girls scored, one of them being Kadie. She scored TWICE! Although one of those was challenged as being offside but the line ref didn't see it, nor did I, or the center ref. From my angle she appeared to be onside when the ball went into play and she says she was even with the defender. So, regardless, she got the goal. We came out with a 6-1 win!

Sara's Candy Canes played next. It was another rough game. We were missing our star player. I only got to see half of the game because I had to take Adam to his game at another soccer complex but John says Sara took quite a few shots and was getting flack from her coach for not dribbling enough. She didn't end up scoring and we lost. Not sure what the score was since they don't really keep score at that age.

I chose to drop Adam off with his coach for his game and have him bring him back to me at Jacob's game so I could watch at least one of the u12 games. It was their last scheduled game (not sure if there will be more, yet) so I wanted to watch. So I didn't get to watch Adam's Sub Zero take home a 7-2 win. Adam didn't score this time, but he didn't let anyone score on him while he was goalie.

Jacob's Dream FC started thirty minutes late due to the game before us starting late since they had no referees. We only had 7 players and the other team had 9. We had already instructed the boys on how to play and where to play being down two players when the other coach offered to only play 7 as well. We said we would see how the first quarter went and then decide if we wanted to have them play down or offer us players. Jacob made our one goal that quarter. He pretty much drove the ball from one end of the field to the other uncontested. He juked players left and right and showed that team he was a force to be reckoned with. We ended the quarter tied. Amazing for playing down! There was a kid that had just finished a game and we asked if he wanted to play with us, he said he did, so we put him in for the remainder of the game. That still had us down 1 player but we were holding our own just fine. That player ended up scoring for us! We went into halftime up 2-1. Jacob went in at goalie after halftime and the other team ended up scoring, tying it up. Jacob kept up the good work all the way to the end. He took another left footed shot that hooked left and I thought it was going right into the upper 90 but it bounced off the corner instead. The player we picked up then took a nice pass from our defense and scored! The line ref called it offside, however. I was not happy. She says 3 of our players were offside when she made the call and that he was one of them. I still don't think he was but she had a better angle than I did, and she was a parent from that kid's team so she didn't like the call anymore than we did. That won't stop me from saying he wasn't offside though. Anyway, we walked away with a tie which is so great having played down the entire game... but it should have been a win.

Lexi and Jacob had their last middle school game on Thursday. They ended up losing 2-1 or 1-0 but they had a lot of fun playing with their friends from school. Lexi will be starting up with her u14 games soon, just not sure when. She started practice last week... cannot wait to watch my biggest baby in the sport she loves!

Soccer Saturday 3-7

My brain has been in a fog lately so I haven't had the motivation to blog. Let's see if I can remember how Saturday's games went.

First up was Adam's game at 9am. He started out as goalie and no one scored on him. The ref was one of the worst we had. The lack of calls and the calls he did make just didn't make sense. Adam ended up scoring two or three times. He said it was two, but I thought it was three. It was a rough game but we still came out with a 6-2 win!

John had referee duty at 9am followed by his game at 1030am. I was only able to make it over for the last quarter of his game due to Sara's game being at 1015am. Thankfully all our games were at the same soccer complex. I walked over to his soccer field and was told to go away because they were winning. I know he was just joking but I walked away anyway. I watched from near the parking lot and the team held up nicely. Jacob took a shot on goal and it bounced off the crossbar. He drove the ball up a second time but got too far up and looked for a drop instead of trying to take the shot. They ended up losing the ball and it went all the way back towards their goal. They ended up with a 3-2 win! Their first win all season.

Sara frustrated me during her game. She is more of the chase the ball kind of player, rather than playing her position. The other team had a player in the front the entire game that just waited for the ball to pass our last defender (there is no offside in u8) and it worked for her almost every time. They also played two defenders back by their goal which gave us pretty much no options for scoring. Sara finally started listening and playing up in the front, where she was supposed to, and waited for the ball instead of running back towards defense every time. It almost resulted in a goal but she missed. We ended up losing like 4-1 but I was proud of her for finally playing her position.

Kadie's game wasn't until 3pm so we went home in between games. She only played two quarters and didn't score. The referee was frustrating, she even told the coaches to tell the parents to stop talking about the play calls from the sidelines. There was only once I made a comment prior to that and it was only that this is u10, so the girls do not get a redo on throw-ins. If they lift their foot, the ball gets turned over to the other team. And when I made the comment it was in favor of the other team. I still wasn't able to bite my tongue and I wasn't making direct comments to any of the referees, just in general as if I was watching a sport on tv. The game was a close one. We scored first, then they scored. We scored two more times making it 3-1. Then they scored, and we scored again. They scored a final time in the 3rd quarter which made the whole fourth quarter intense. The girls played hard and they had some amazing passes to keep the ball in their possession. We managed to hold them for a 4-3 win!

Lexi and Jacob had two games last week, on Tuesday and Thursday. Jacob played in the game on Tuesday which resulted in a 1-0 loss. On Thursday he wasn't able to play due to not knowing he had to attend tutorial prior to the game. He wasn't happy about it but it seems he learned his lesson since he made sure to attend this week so he could play in their final week. He also missed the first week of games because of his grades, which he is working on. Just wish he would put more effort into his schoolwork, but that is a whole other blog post. Anyway, Thursday's game ended in a 0-0 tie and went into a shootout. They took the first shot and missed. Then we missed, and they missed again. We missed a second time. We both missed on our third and fourth tries. They missed on their fifth shot, as well. Our fifth player took their shot and scored! Had we missed we would have went into a second set of 5 but that final shot gave us the win! They played again last night but I wasn't able to make the game. They finished the game tied 1-1 and went into a shootout again. This time we came away with a loss. The kids really like playing for the middle school. It was a just for fun type of league but it is much more relaxed with the rules. The kids can go out there and be aggressive and the players actually know what they are doing. It's fun to watch but at the same time, frustrating when there is too much shoving. Last year Lexi was hurt by a member of another team, and this year a kid grabbed her arm during a game. She is a pistol though and doesn't take any crap. She puts up a fight and isn't afraid to shove a boy back. I love watching her play co-ed, it is where she excels. Playing on an all girl's team can get frustrating when half the team just doesn't care or doesn't know what they are doing or are afraid of getting run in to. She is not afraid. It is also the only time her and her brother get along. On the soccer field they are teammates... at home they are worst enemies LOL

So there you have it. A pretty good week of soccer, if I do say so myself. So proud of my kids and their ambition on the field... now if they could just be as proactive with their school work and chores, I would be super happy ;)

Surprise, Surprise

Before leaving the soccer field on Saturday, John informed me their was a gift on our bed for me. I knew it was our dating anniversary, but I didn't think much of it since he didn't really do anything (strike that, he did NOTHING, and pretty much ignored me) on Valentine's Day.

I got home and our houseguest asked where John was. The way she asked was kind of unsettling, like she was mad at him for something. She then suggested I go upstairs. That's when I remembered that he had told me about the gift on the bed. The two of them were weirding me out.

I went upstairs to find a gift wrapped in purple wrapping paper with a silver bow on it. I can only assume he did that because those were our wedding colors. I unwrapped the gift to find it in a Christmas box with the word HO imprinted all over it (as in Ho Ho Ho, Santa Claus, you know). I laughed and then sent him a text poking fun... "What are you trying to say?!" was the caption I sent along with a picture of the box. His response was, "That I couldn't find a box! Now pick one and get ready."

I didn't see that message right away and I opened the box to find two beautiful dresses. I searched all over for some kind of note with instructions (remember, I didn't see the text message), but there were none. Kristi, our friend, was standing in the doorway and I said, "I should probably shower and get ready then, huh?" She said that would be a good idea. She offered up that she was the babysitter and that my husband was taking me out, although she wasn't sure where.

I chose the shorter of the two dresses because it fit me better but that also meant I had to shave my legs. You'd think living in Hawaii would mean my legs are always ready for anything but that's just not true. I managed a quick shower and a half-ass shave job but it was good enough to look and feel pretty. I was pretty much ready when John got home from soccer. All I needed to do was figure out what shoes I was wearing, brush my teeth, and wait for him to get ready.

We left at 415pm for our 515 reservation. I still had no idea where we were going and spent the entire 45 minute drive thinking about where we might be going. He told me he already knew what he was ordering for our meal, so all I had to do was chose a drink when we arrived. I ran down some places in my head that I thought he may have picked and even briefly suspected Red Lobster, even though that is a mainland option, only because he said he knew what he was ordering for me. We ended up at a restaurant called Ocean House in the Outrigger Reef hotel, with beach front seating. The staff was amazing. Twice we were told we didn't look old enough to be celebrating 15 years, which is kind of true. It definitely doesn't feel like it has been that long. He ordered the coconut lobster skewers for our appetizer, the seafood pot for himself, and the filet mignon and lobster tail for me. I ordered a lava flow cocktail for myself and a peach bourbon smash for him. They brought out complimentary bread and our appetizer. The skewers were really good. Our food came out rather quickly and while the lobster tail was good, I didn't really care for the filet mignon but I appreciated his choice in my dinner. We were offered a dessert menu but were too full from dinner to order anything. They then brought us a complimentary sorbet dessert for our anniversary and took a picture of us. The dessert was great and the perfect end to our dinner date. When they brought the bill, they also brought us a complimentary photo print to commemorate our anniversary dinner. It was a great experience, albeit a bit pricey. I don't think we have ever spent that much on dinner alone.

He said the night wasn't over after dinner, so we walked down the beach to the Hale Koa Hotel. He bought us tickets to a comedy show that started at 8pm. We arrived shortly before 730pm. They took our picture before seating us at a table for 6 with 2 other guests. Another couple arrived shortly after that for a full table. I ordered another lava flow and he ordered a gin and tonic. The show was hilarious. Two opening acts and Bo Irvine as the headliner. Bo was so funny. He really didn't even stick to his show because he spent the majority of time joking directly with the audience. He talked a lot about marriage and the hilarity of it, which made it the perfect show for our date... even though we were only celebrating our dating anniversary. The way our table was set up allowed for me to cuddle up next to my hubby, which made it so much better than sitting at a table.

I managed to stay awake for the drive home, even though I was exhausted from the day that started at 630am. We got home around 11pm and finished out our night the only way a great date night should (I'll leave the rest to your imagination).

I was pleasantly surprised by the effort he put into celebrating 15 years together. It was a much welcomed surprise. He had never bought me a dress before. He rarely plans anything for us that doesn't involve a military function. I joked that he cannot spring such a surprise on a woman. Had I known what was planned I could have planned better. I would have made sure to shave my legs, I could have gotten a pedicure and maybe a manicure, as well. I wouldn't have stayed up until midnight the night before knowing we would be up that late again on Saturday. But he did good and I love that he went through all the trouble to plan a surprise date night for me. He even wrote a book inside a card telling me how much he loved me.

It truly amazes me how he can still put in all this effort after all the years we have been together. After putting up with me for so long and our roller coaster of a relationship, he has every right to be done trying but then he does something like this that restores my faith in our life together. I am so happy to call him my husband because he truly does love me unconditionally.

Thank you, baby, for all that you do for our family and for trying to put me first in a life where I always come second to the Army. That bitch may get all the attention, but dammit, I win this time ;)

Soccer Saturday - 2/28

Our day started off bright and early. We had to be in Pearl City at 8am for our first game. Kadie kicked off the day with her game. Followed by ref duty and Sara's game at 10, then Adam & Jacob's games at noon, and another ref duty at 130pm.

Kadie's Bombers started off rough. Kadie began the game as goalkeeper and was scored on twice. In the second quarter, Kadie scored twice tying it up. The first time was a breakaway and the second time was just being in the right place at the right time. She scored a third time but was called offside in an iffy call. I say she wasn't offside since she was even with the last defender when the ball was put into play but it wasn't my call. We kept up the momentum, Kadie assisted with another goal and the other team got off a third goal shortly before the game ended. The Bombers ended with a 6-3 win!

Following that game, Lexi and I helped Kadie's coach with our referee assignment. Lexi and I ran the line while the coach center reffed. Some of the parents on my side of the field were not too happy with some of the calls but they were pretty good calls. At the end of the game I had the other coach (also the guy that runs the ref clinics) say he wanted me! He was surprised that I knew what I was doing even though I had never been to one of his clinics. That comes from 10 years as a soccer mom! I may not always get the call right, but I am pretty good... and being told so by the head ref, that's a major plus.

We missed all of Sara's game but I did get updated by John. Sara scored once and had an assist in a Candy Canes 6-4 win!

We made it over to Adam's game shortly before it started. Adam started out as goalie and no one scored on him! The game went downhill from there. The boys just were not playing their best. It was hot and Adam was worn out. He runs the field and usually doesn't give up but he just didn't seem like he was feeling it that day. The other team was offside several times, that resulted in a goal, and it wasn't called. I was extremely irritated. There was a lot of shoving, too, that went unnoticed. There was one point where the goalie handed the ball to his defender which should have resulted in a penalty kick but that also went without a call. Adam never ended up scoring but I was still proud of his goalkeeping skills. It was a really frustrating game that Team Sub Zero ended up losing 6-1. It was their first loss and a hard one.

I also missed all of Jacob's game since it was at the same time as Adam's. They only had 7 players to start the game so the other team played down to seven, as well. Within the first ten minutes we were losing 2-0. By the end of the first quarter it was 3-0. Jacob ended up scoring on a PK and another player showed up making it 8v8. In the end, Dream FC came away with another loss, 6-1.

When that game ended, John and Lexi had a referee assignment. Just in the first quarter there were a lot of calls for tripping and shoving. It seemed like a tough game to ref and I was glad to not be doing it.

Oh, I forgot, Lexi and Jacob have also started playing soccer with their school. Those games are on Tuesday and Thursday. Jacob should finally be able to play today since he brought his grades up. Last week, only Lexi was able to play (she's the good little girl LoL). The Tuesday game was played versus Kapolei Middle School. The A team, which is the team Lexi is on, lost 3-0. The field was tiny, compared to what she is used to, and she played defense the majority of the game. Kapolei played pretty dirty. I even snapped a picture of one of the boys on their team grabbing Lexi's arm. There was a lot of that going on and the referee wasn't calling it. The Thursday game was against Waianae, and they always play dirty so we were a little worried. That was the game last year that Lexi got tripped and busted up her arm and hip. This year they split the teams into boys and girls instead of A team and B team. The field was even smaller, as were the goals, than Tuesday's game. Lexi played midfield for the majority of the game. I guess one coach likes her as a defender and the other likes her at mid or forward. She almost scored on a header, and she almost scored on a left footed shot, and had she been just a second faster she could have snuck in a goal from a pass but the goalie snagged it before she could get there. The girls ended up with a 1-0 loss but the boys came out with a 1-0 win, so it all evened out. I think the B team won on Tuesday, too. They have another game this afternoon where Jacob will be playing with Lexi on the A team (hopefully), so we will see how that goes.

Good Deeds

How often do you perform good deeds, or random acts of kindness (RAOK)? I don't do them as often as I used to, but I still squeeze in some good karma from time to time. 

Every once in awhile I will buy coffee for the driver behind me at the Starbucks drive-thru. Who doesn't love a free coffee from time to time? And you never know, you may have just turned their bad day into a good one... or at least a semi-decent one :)

There are times when I am on the road and I see someone panhandling or holding a sign asking for food. I don't always have cash on me but if I have a couple extra bucks or some loose change lying around, I will drop it in their bucket. There were a couple guys at Walmart by the main street holding a sign that said "Cash for Good Karma" or something along those lines. I handed them a $5 bill and wondered how much good karma that would buy me. I tease. I mean, I did wonder that but only in a half hearted, joking kind of way. I dropped some change in a bucket just the other day for "Homeless Kids" here in Hawaii. Do I really know if they are going to use the money for the homeless keiki, no, but it still feels good to feel like I am helping out. It's my good deed no matter what they do with the money. My heart is in the right place. I once gave a homeless man some food I had leftover in my car from our lunch, too. He was very grateful. 

Good deeds don't have to be big. They also don't need to cost you any money. Hold a door open for someone that needs help, or just because they were walking behind you. I helped a lady with a stroller get into the door of the doctor's office while other people just sat and watched her struggle. I offered to take someone's banana peel and throw it away for her because she walked by my house holding it and had awhile to go before ever reaching a garbage can (she was walking to school). I once closed a family's minivan door in the parking lot at Disney World when one of them left it open. I know I hate coming back to my car to find the door wide open because one of my kids forgot to close it, and this was at Disney World. It's not likely they had valuables in there but who knows... minivan mamas usually have some sort of enertainment in their cars for their kids. I would have been pissed to find my kids would be bored in the car for the drive home because we left the door open and someone stole their electronics we left in there ;)

So, get out there and do some good deeds, people. Put a grocery cart back in the cart corral because some idiot couldn't walk the extra five feet to put it away. Hold a door for the elderly, or moms with their hands full, or the random person behind you. Pick up some garbage, or offer a helping hand to someone. Buy a coffee for the person behind you, or pay for someone's groceries when they look like they are struggling. Let someone use your store discount card so they can get the sales. Give your unused coupons to someone in the grocery store. Offer up money saving advice in the coffee aisle when you start talking about how awesome your Keurig is but the k-cups are so expensive (FYI, don't buy hot chocolate k-cups, buy Swiss Miss packets and add it to your cup before adding hot water from your Keurig... WAYYYYY cheaper!). 

Just get out there and make the world a better place! We don't have to be millionaires donating thousands of dollars to charity to feel like we are making a difference. Helping one person have a better or easier day is making the difference for that person, and the more people that are having a better day, the happier this world will be!

Pet Peeves & Car Seats

We all have pet peeves, some of them are small annoyances like nails on a chalkboard, or the sound of someone snapping their gum. Sometimes they are big pet peeves like unvaccinnated children, or mainstream media.

For me, my biggest pet peeve is seeing children riding in a vehicle not properly restrained. I have to admit though, while it is a major pet peeve of mine I am not guilty of not properly restraining my kids.

I know I am not perfect. I know I have made many mistakes, like we all have. I know I am a hypocrit when it comes to my own pet peeve when I replay a video of my kids in the car and decide not to post it on Facebook because my kids weren't the safest they could be while riding in the car.

Like many people, I will still hold my ground on what I believe to be the best choice for our family at any given time. However, realizing we are all only human has made me take a step back and not be so judgmental because we do not know what someone else's situation is.

That picture of a sleeping child in a car with the seatbelt behind their back makes me cringe. At the same time, though, I can't make a judgement based solely on one picture. Maybe right after that picture was taken the parent corrected the seatbelt. Or maybe it was just a long day for them and they felt it would be okay for the drive. Do I agree that it is okay just once? No, absolutely not. Yet, I am also guilty of making a decision in the name of "just this once" and everything turning out alright.

That picture of a baby riding in a car seat that is too big, too small, or with twisted straps makes me want to get on my soapbox about the importance of using a car seat properly. But I don't. Maybe they borrowed a car seat while they waited for their new one to arrive. Maybe they were on the tail end of a road trip and those straps ended up twisted but driving all day with a cranky kid they just overlooked the fact that it's not very safe. I think everyone should be aware of the proper use of a car seat and at what age a child can safely use the next seat up, but sadly some people just go with what they have always done or what "everyone else" says is okay.

I'm not here to judge you... although sometimes I do. I just want you to know there is a safer way to travel with your children. With car accidents being the leading cause of death in children it is our responsibility to do our own research and find the best seat for our children. Even if that means they are 9 years old and still riding in a 5pt harness. Or 12 years old and riding in a backless booster seat.

Let me tell you, their friends won't be riding in the same seats they are. Some much younger won't be riding in car seats at all. Some kids are big enough to ride without a car seat but only if their feet sit flat on the floor with their back straight on the seat and the seatbelt sitting across their shoulder and over their hips. More often than not, the kids riding without at least a booster are not meeting those criteria. Your kid may complain, they may pull the friend card, but you should be pulling the mom card. Don't be afraid to insist they ride in a proper seat until they are big enough to ride without. Don't let them ride without just because they don't like the seat or just because none of their friends have to. You wouldn't put your kid on an amusement ride that they aren't big enough for... so why would you put your kid in a seat they aren't big enough for?

So now I will step down off my soapbox, even though I am not trying to be all high and mighty. Education on these things in our children's life is so important. We research vaccinations, we research the best neighborhoods and the best schools, we research our vehicles for their safety ratings... we should be doing the same with car seat safety. I don't always agree with the AAP but their guidelines for child safety in the car are very good. While these guidelines are not laws, they are still important and worth a good look to be able to make an informed decision in regards to your child's safety.

I hope with this blog I at least gave a little bit of helpful information without sounding too bitchy and that at least one person will consider putting in the research instead of doing what they have been told from their older relatives or the laws that vary so much from state to state.

Movie Review Monday

This week I watched a few new movies, well new to me. I asked for The Purge fpr Christmas but I wasn't aware that there were two of them and since my brother in law didn't know which one I would want, he bought me both. So while I was busy procrastinating what I needed to do all week, I watched both of them. Then my oldest wanted to go see a movie with her friends and instead of just dropping her off, I took the three youngest to go see the new Spongebob movie. I will try my best to review what I saw but it really turned into an $8 nap for me since I had only gotten 4 hours of sleep the night before.

The Purge - This movie is set in the future. 2022, I believe. The country had implemented a new law that would allow anyone to commit any crime of their choosing, including murder, for a total of only 12 hours on purge night. The idea behind the purge was to eliminated crime for the remaining 364 1/2 days of the year and to help cut down on the homeless and lower class population that was dragging the country down. Those people were usually the targets of those looking to purge. Police officers and high ranking officials were exempt from becoming targets, and all emergency services were suspended during the purge. A wealthy family, that gained their wealth from selling home security systems with the purge in mind, became a target this year. The family had to find out how far they would go to protect themselves and realized that even with the best safeguards and wealth, it still didn't make you safe on purge night. The movie was well done, in my opinion. It had a great level of suspense, and it wasn't too predictable. It is definitely not a movie that children should be watching, unless your children are old enough and able to handle movies with a lot of killing. It was pretty gory, but not as bad as I had expected. No worse than any zombie movie out there. The whole premise of the movie was quite intriguing to me, which is why I had asked for the movie in the first place. It did not disappoint. I thought it was a really great movie. If you like suspense, drama, and a good psycho flick, then this is a must.

The Purge: Anarchy - Same premise as the first, just a year later. In this year's purge we find ourselves following a group of strangers that come together to protect each other after finding themselves targets. A husband and wife find themselves stuck outside when the purge begins leaving them unarmed and in harms way. A mother and daughter find themselves targeted for being poor. And a man puts himself in harms way because he is on a mission of justice on this one night where justice is served by the community themselves. We find out in this rendition that the wealthy can buy poor people to slaughter. The idea of the purge is to cleanse one's soul. By participating, you are cleansing your soul until next year. It's much like a religious cult where everyone believes that this way is the right way and if you don't participate then your soul is tainted. However, there is a group that is trying to counteract the purge, to put an end to it. I liked this year's purge better than the previous one. It was the same level of killing, but the action was more intense. Having a group of strangers working together and being stranded outside trying to find safety just made it that more intense. Predictability was rather low, it really left me on the edge of my seat for a good majority of the movie. There was one character that I was surprised we didn't find out what happened come the end of the movie but maybe there will be another movie where she comes back... or they thought her last line was good enough to tell us what happened to her. The characters are pushed to their limits and they must decide to fight or die at the hands of those participating in the purge. They fight their own inner demons in order to survive the demons coming out of the participants. It really is a good series, if you like that sort of thing. If you can't handle blood and gore then definitely skip these movies. Oh, there was one other thing that surprised me... while The Purge is in place, all crime is acceptable, but there is no rape in either movie. A brief sexual scene in the first movie but both were fully clothed and it was consensual. The main focus of both movies is murder and while they could have thrown in some disgusting rape scenes (there were a few times I was waiting for it to happen), they didn't. I applaud the writers for steering clear of that.

Now, onto a much happier note...

The Spongebob Movie: Sponge Out of Water - Like I stated earlier, I cannot attest to the entire movie because I did end up falling asleep for the entire middle of it, but I will do my best to give a good review of what I did see. I really wasn't planning on bringing my kids to see this in the theater. Most times, I don't feel like the cost of a kids movie is really worth it. This movie was an hour and thirty minutes. Pretty typical length of a movie these days. I have seen some that are more like an hour and twenty minutes and paying the price for such short movies kinda gives me anxiety. I think this one was the right length. Not too short, not too long... I'm not regretting paying for it. In this reincarnation of Spongebob, we follow him and is friends as they venture out of Bikini Bottom in hopes of recovering the lost Krabby Patty recipe. Things become a mess down in Bikini Bottom. Friends turn on friends but eventually, all is well again when they join together to put Bikini Bottom back on it's feet. I fell asleep before we even got to "Sponge out of water" and woke up towards the end. Spongebob is rather stupid show... but it's funny. From what I saw, there wasn't a lot of crude humor, mostly just silly kid stuff. The pirate in the movie is played by Antonio Banderas, and I absolutely LOVED his portrayal of Burger Beard. He is such a well rounded and fun actor. The kids loved the movie from beginning to end. They were asking me what I saw and telling me what I missed. It was a good kid date movie. They enjoyed it, I got a nap in, and Spongebob is just fun to watch on the big screen. If you are wanting to go to the movies with the kids and you all like Spongebob, go see it. But go during matinee prices... save yourself a little bit of money. Or, just wait til it comes out on DVD and definitely rent it. It's a fun movie with some silly, sometimes stupid, humor but it wasn't terrible humor. I laughed out loud quite a few times for only having seen less than half of the movie.

Soccer Saturday 2-21

There was no soccer last week due to torrential downpours. My poor hubby and three of the kids came home soaked after ref duty that started before the rain cancelled the remainder of the games for the day. That's why there was no soccer update last week.

This week, however, we had 5 games. The first game was at 830am, which was just a game that Lexi and I had to help referee, in Pearl City. The second game was at 930am in Honolulu. John took Adam, Sara, and Jacob to that one. The third game was at 10am in Pearl City (following our ref duty) for Kadie so I had the two older girls with me. The fourth game was Sara's at 1130am, and the fifth game was Jacob's at 12pm in Waipahu. We were all over the place yesterday and I am beyond thankful for a husband that can be here to help out.

At our ref duty, all the action was on my side of the field and I had a 10 year old yell at me TWICE for calls I made. His team was losing 3-0 and they ended up coming back and winning 6-3, so being mad at me for making a call wasn't really worth it. At least he was passionate about it LoL The parents on the sidelines were driving me a little nuts though. Not so much their complaining about the calls on the field by the center ref but about the way they talked to their kids about what went wrong on the field. Maybe I am just as bad, I don't know, but dang, have a little more respect and don't badmouth other players to your child.

Kadie's game resulted in their first win! The girls played pretty great for the majority of the game. There were a few times they were bunched up but mostly they stayed spread out and got the ball where it needed to go. Kadie had a great break away and took a nice shot on goal with her left foot, scoring the first goal of the game. She came right back and scored a second time! Then the coach told her to take a corner kick which was amazing. For being 10 years old and never really having to take many corner kicks, she got it right where it needed to go. It bounced off a defender and into the goal giving her a hat trick! She had another nice break away and ended up being shoved down inside the goal box without the defender making a play on the ball. No penalty was called and somehow the ball didn't go out of bounds. I was still mad about her getting shoved and missed what happened next. All I know is the ball was in the middle of the goal box with a bunch of girls fighting for it, including Kadie, and she ended up scoring ANOTHER goal! Final score, 6-1! It was a great game to watch and you can tell the girls are already improving and becoming more confident in themselves as soccer players. Let's hope they keep up this momentum!

I only received a few updates from John about Adam's game so I do not have any specifics. About 15 minutes into the game (so, the second quarter), Adam scored tying it at 2-2. He scored again just before halftime making it 4-2! Just before the game ended he snuck in another shot for a hat trick! Final score, 8-3! Way to go, Team Sub Zero! They are currently undefeated. They are a mighty little team!

I made it to Sara's game shortly before the 1st quarter ended. When Sara came off the field she was already tired. Poor girl just cannot keep up like the rest of my kids, especially when we have to get up at 630am on a Saturday and play all day in the hot sun. Her team didn't seem too into the game. Maybe they were hot, maybe they were tired, or maybe they were just already feeling defeated by a much better team. These girls are only u8 and the team they played was outstanding. Their footwork skills would be envied by my 12 and 14 year olds. Sara had a nice break away at one point and for some reason just gave up. She completely stopped following the ball and had she kept going she probably would have scored. On another break away she took a shot from the left side with her right foot and missed. Had she taken it with her left foot she may have made it. I went in to ref for the second half (parents/coaches ref for their own u8 team) and while I probably shouldn't have, I was coaching the girls on the field. Sara had another nice break away and this time game up with a goal! It was the only goal her team scored. Come to find out, the team they were playing was a club or select team, meaning they have had way more practice and a much higher quality training than out girls. The final score was 8-1. At least it wasn't a shut out.

After Sara's game we went over to Jacob's game that was just coming off the field for halftime. They were losing 4-0 (I think). The boys were playing down a player but still doing great for only have 8 players on the field. I told Jacob he needed to score twice since Sara scored once, Adam scored three times, and Kadie scored four times. Then it would be 1, 2, 3, 4 for the day. He went back out on the field and had a nice break away resulting in an amazing shot on goal and it went in! He broke away a few more times but came up short. The other team was just dominating us in speed. Their shots on goal weren't amazing but they were good enough to go in. Jacob ended up hurting his back when he tried to be superman and leap over a player's leg to turn the ball around at the end of the third quarter. In the fourth quarter he had quite a few break aways but just couldn't hang onto the ball long enough to get anything. He and another player ended up colliding and he went down on his shoulder. He had already said he hurt his shoulder during another game so I was a bit concerned but he got up and went right back at it. We ended up losing 6-1. Again, at least it wasn't a shut out. The other team just outplayed us and with them having an extra player, it really didn't help us. The lack of calling on the slide tackling was a bit frustrating, too. There was this one kid that kept slide tackling and playing the ball from the ground (which you cannot do). The referee only called it once. John was getting pissed and I had to tell him to calm down. Pretty rich coming from me, the queen of yelling at the refs. I have to admit, it's not really something I can help. It just comes out even though I know how hard it is to ref and feel like you are making the right calls and knowing when to let the boys play and when to enforce the penalty. There are quite a few iffy plays and you either just make the call and risk pissing people off or don't make the call and risk pissing people off. It's really a lose-lose-lose situation for refs.

Anyway, since all my kids scored (besides Lexi because she didn't play yesterday), I now owe them all Starbucks! Kadie keeps insisting I owe her four because she scored four times. A. I cannot afford to be paying out Starbucks for EVERY goal they make. That would be 9 drinks just for ONE day of soccer! Not happening kid! And B. the deal is not for each goal, the deal is if they score they get Starbucks. She scored, end of story. She was pretty amazing though, so maybe I will let her get a cake pop or donut, too ;)

Blah Ditty Blah

I've been trying to come up with things to blog about all week and feel like I just can't piece my thoughts together enough to put it into words for the world to read.

I've thought about writing about pet peeves but it was really only about one pet peeve... and then I found myself guilty of said pet peeve and just couldn't bring myself to judge others for driving me absolutely bat shit crazy with their lack of regard when it comes to how their children ride in the car when I, myself, just did exactly what I HATE! More accurately, I let my kid get away with something that I am totally against. I guess part of that comes from being a parent... we all make mistakes and let some things slide when we know we shouldn't. I really don't want to get into this, which is why I never started writing about it in the first place.

I had thought about writing a What's For Dinner Wednesday post but Wednesdays are our busiest soccer practice days so what would I say in my post? Dinner, what's that? It was probably leftovers or a WYCF night. That's "whatever you can find," meaning cereal, ramen, a nutella sandwich, or easy mac because my kids are very capable of getting those all on their own. Oh, actually, we had McDonald's on Wednesday. My son had a dr's appointment and missed an entire day of school because of it, then I dropped my van off to get an oil change and alignment which took a lot longer than anticipated so we ended up in the McDonald's drive thru. I had a Happy Meal... pretty much the healthiest thing on the menu LoL

I even considered getting back into Fun Photo Friday but today is Friday and I have no fun photos to share. I am big into Facebook so when I have photos to share I share them there. <- a="" all="" always="" amazing="" an="" and="" anyway="" are="" as="" besides="" big="" blog="" blurry="" book="" camera="" captured="" compared="" computer="" dark="" defense="" did="" does="" don="" dr.="" dull="" even="" for="" get="" going="" good="" have="" i="" if="" in="" internet.="" is="" it="" joy.="" jump="" just="" kinda="" like="" looks="" manage="" mars="" moon="" my="" nbsp="" not="" of="" often="" on="" out="" over="" p="" part="" pictures="" pop="" problem.="" screen="" see="" seuss="" shot="" so="" sounds="" t="" take="" that="" the="" they="" to.="" to="" tonight.="" totally="" tripod="" try="" turn="" up="" used="" venus="" what="" will="" with="" you="">
I did get my Movie Review Monday post in... and I have one planned for next week already since I watched two new movies this week. I asked my brother in law for "The Purge" for Christmas, and he bought me both "The Purge" and "The Purge: Anarchy." My 12 year old watched the first one with me (well, part of it), and chickened out from watching the second one. Oh well, he probably shouldn't be watching so much gory crap anyway... look at me sounding like a helicopter parent, ha!

There is one post that I want to put out there soon but I have to get the words right. It will be about parents... the kind that are essentially forced to be parents to kids that aren't there own but they push through, and they drop everything for those kids without regret. I know someone that did that 9mths ago and she just received the best news this week. More on that later, though. Like I said, it needs to be worded perfect and I should probably start with the back story.

So yeah, that's my blog for now... just kinda blah. I told you, quantity over quality, right? Just please continue to read... all like 5 of you, and I know at least one of you lives with me ;)

Jack-Up

My whole life, people have messed up my name. As a 30-something, Brianna, my name was always mispronounced because it just wasn't a common name. Now I hear it everywhere. Little girls, older girls, and a handful of 20-somethings. I now go by Bri, but that gets misspelled more often than not. I get Brie, Bre, and Bree on the majority of my Starbucks cups.

When my kids were born, I didn't choose hard to pronounce names. They are pronouced just like they are spelled. However, that never stopped anyone from saying it wrong. Even our last name is mispronounced and it's pretty straight forward.

With my oldest, she was often called Alexandria, even though there is no I in her name. It happened often, at the doctor's office, at the WIC office, at school. Then, even though I listed her nickname, Lexi, on all school paperwork people would still call her Alex. And at Starbucks, they almost always spell her name Lexy. It's always fun when they actually spell it right without asking how to spell it!

My middle daughter is Kaydence. Her name was always butchered. People would call her Candace, as if I just misspelled her name. Or Can-Dance was often called out. Why? I have no clue. I didn't think it was that hard to read her name and sound it out. Her nickname, Kadie, is often misspelled because it sounds the same as Katie, so she has resorted to spelling it out and even then it gets misspelled.

Adam is a fairly easy name. No one has pronounced it wrong but I do get emails from Barnes & Noble with the name Adaru because whoever put the information in couldn't read my writing. The funniest part is I signed all my kids up for the birthday club at the same time and the only odd name was "Adaru." One would think they would have noticed it seemed out of place but no big deal. Guess my writing was just too hard to read ;)

My youngest is Sara, no H. She is only 8 but she makes sure people know there is no H on the end of her name. No one has yet to mispronounce her name but at this point I wouldn't put it past someone to screw it up.

Today, I actually had someone pronounce Jacob wrong. One of the most popular boy names in the history of FOREVER and it was pronounced as Jack-Up. It's bad enough that I have to spell it out so they don't spell it with a K, now I have to correct someone because they have clearly never seen the name Jacob before.

So, do people mispronounce names because names are getting more unique, or do they mispronounce them because they have never seen the name before? How often does your name get messed up. And does it bother you?

It doesn't really bother me, it just shocks me every time it happens because our names are not that difficult. At least, I don't think they are.

The Little Things

Marriage is complicated. When you are dating you spend all this time and effort doing little, sweet things for each other because really that's all you could afford, so it was always the thought that counted. As your relationship developed into something more, so did your efforts. Now you count the big things you do for each other instead of the little things.

Marriage is weird. You sleep next to someone for the rest of your life that irritates you more than your crazy aunt. You put up with their quirks and fight over who left dirty dishes on the counter instead of putting them into the sink or dishwasher. You talk about the rash you found under your boobs and ask them to smell your feet.

Marriage isn't about the big things, yet we focus on those so often that we forget about the little things. My husband and I just spent days fighting over what turned out to be an issue with the little things, not the big things.

My role in this marriage is to take care of the household. I pay the bills, I make sure the kids have clean school clothes, I do the grocery shopping, put the groceries away, and make dinner for a family of 7, I make sure we have healthy foods in the house, along with some snacky stuff cause who doesn't love snacky stuff, and I worry about the future, if the money is going to stop coming, if my kids will survive another move, if my marriage will last through all the changes that we are facing. My role is a pretty big one. Without me, this house would likely fall apart. So I spend my days taking care of the big things. I wear myself out with the cleaning and the cooking and the homeschooling and the child rearing and the bill paying and the worrying that at the end of the day I forget about the little things.

I sigh when my husband wraps his arms around my waist while I am trying to cook dinner. I sit at the edge of the sofa waiting for him to come greet me with a kiss when he gets home from work. I go to bed before he does, sometimes not even telling him that I am going to bed. I get mad when I see he left another beer can on the end table or the loaf of bread on the counter. I let my stress dictate how I react when he walks in the door and then in turn everything begins to annoy me and it leads to sleeping with an invisible wall between us.

I know what you are thinking, what kind of wife am I that treats her husband like this? Well, let me tell you. I am a stressed out mom of 5. I have a lot on my plate and am constantly being pulled in 12 million directions at once. My husband works ALL.THE.TIME. and when he is home he wants to relax... and so do I, but we can't both relax at the same time because something ALWAYS needs done. The stress gets to both of us and we end up not seeing the little things the other person says/does.

We read a book called The Five Love Languages to determine how we show love and how we want to be shown love. We are not even the same in that regard. I like to show my love by buying little things for those that I love, or doing the little things like serving them dinner, or writing little notes for them. The every day things I do that have become so expected that they can't be seen as the little things anymore.

I buy cadbury creme eggs for my husband even though he shouldn't be eating them and it's not even that close to Easter but he LOVES them, so I buy him a few. I make him a bacon rose bouquet for Valentine's Day because he likes bacon and it was something fun and unique for him. I serve him his dinner after I have finished cooking and made up everyone else's plate before making my own plate. I remind him of things he needs to do. I wear the necklace he bought me. I share my last cigarette with him. I manage his soccer team. I even put on extra deodorant before I go to bed just in case I stink ;)

Sometimes these things just aren't enough though. They go unnoticed because they are so typical or so small that they get overlooked. The things that are noticed are the times I forgot to say thank you, or the time I didn't kiss him goodnight, or the time I shrugged away from a hug because I just wasn't feeling like being loved on. Then all those little things add up into a big thing that leads to someone feeling unloved or unappreciated.

So, if not doing the little things adds up into a big deal... then shouldn't doing the little things add up into a big deal? Think about all the little things you do and the times you haven't done them and we should all make a bigger deal out of doing the little things. And if you notice your spouse not doing the little things, speak up before it becomes a big thing. And if you notice you aren't doing the little things, or the little things you are doing aren't being noticed, then do something about it. We need to stop thinking the other person knows they are upsetting us and stop letting it build up before saying something.

Movie Review Monday

This weekend, a much anticipated and much criticized movie was released in theaters. Unless you have been living under rock, I know you know what I am talking about. 50 Shades of Grey!

This movie covered the first book of the 50 Shades series based on a BDSM relationship that was derived from Twilight fan fiction. No wonder it has gotten so much heat, and not the good kind. I actually liked the book. I wasn't sure if I would but it really pulls you in.

As for the movie, it was ruined for me due to all the criticism the series has received. I had heard the sex scenes were horrible. I had heard the sex scenes were straight up porn. I had heard that anyone who actually likes the books and movie are idiots with no sense of what real literature really is.

Let me start by saying that no one reads a saucy novel to pick apart the errors made by the author. Poor grammar can be overlooked when the book sucks you into the fantasy world within the pages. No one is claiming this is a work of amazing literature. What they are saying though is this book offers the reader what any book offers, the chance to live vicariously through the characters. No one should be called unitelligent just because they like this series.

I should probably get to my movie review at some point or I could probably sit here and type out my opposition to the haters and not be able to stop. So without further adieu... the review of 50 Shades of Grey, the movie.

When the movie started everyone in our theater continued to talk. Not even in a children's movie are the theater goers that disprectful at the beginning of a movie. We actually had to turn and shush some younger guys that just wouldn't shut up. Eventually it quited down significantly but there were a few snickers and even a very heated sounding, "Oh my god!" at one point that kind of took away from the movie. If I could see the movie for the first time at home, instead of in the theater with ignorant patrons, I may have enjoyed it more than I did.

The movie seemed to follow the book better than I had anticipated. Usually I don't remember the book so I'm pleasantly surprised by what happens in the movie but this time there were no surprises. I remembered most everything that was going on and I remember thinking several times, "Oh, this is about to happen..."

The sex scenes were very well done, albeit a bit on the pornographic side. They were hot and heavy and very realistic looking. My friend made the comment that the actor playing Christian Grey didn't want his wife to see the movie... and we can completely understand why! Both actors have very nice bodies that were accented very well on the big screen and for a book that centers around this kind of relationship, it didn't overpower the rest of the movie. Yes, there was sex in the movie. Yes, the sex was pretty graphic. Yes, it probably left some people ready to fuck in the backseat of their cars before going home. But, it was not all sex. It was not at all raunchy. It was as classy as you can get given the nature of the book in the first place.

The reason I say the movie was ruined was because I couldn't just sit there and enjoy the movie for what it was. A fictional movie, based on a fictional book. I am usually really good about just enjoying something for what it is. I don't nit pick or laugh at something saying, "that wouldn't happen!" like a lot of people tend to do, especially those that are involved in whatever lifestyle is being portrayed in the movie. Regardless of how I usually am, I found myself constantly being reminded of the criticism. I would be watching a scene and think, "Oh, that's what they meant by that." or, "this sex scene is pretty good, why would they think it was bad?" or, "people really are freaking out about this?" So, it kept me distracted from actually enjoying a movie that I was really looking forward to seeing.

My recommendation: Re-read the book. Get yourself back into the 50 Shades mindset that made me anticipate this movie so much. Wait til the hoopla dies down and go with your spouse or best friend when the theater is nearly empty.  Or just wait for the DVD and make it a night in. If you haven't read the book and you only want to see this to see what all this hoopla is about, go in with an open mind. If you go in with negativity in your mind then you will not enjoy it. I actually liked the movie, I just would have enjoyed it more if I wasn't so distracted by all the haters and the snickering from the crowd around me.

Hawaii Winter

When you think of Hawaii you don't think about winter. It's practically the same temperature year round here. In the summer months our temps range from about 70-90. That's a pretty broad range because 90% of the time it sits between 78 and 85 for months on end.

Winter, though, that's our rainy and windy season. The temps can get down to the high 50's at night and high 70's at the peak of the day. Even if it is sunny out it can still feel cold due to the wind. Nothing like the rest of the United States is dealing with, no, but cold for those of us that actually have lived in Hawaii long enough to get acclimated.

It didn't take me long to get acclimated to 70's feeling cold. I was so glad to have brought my hoodies and boots. I never miss an opportunity to wear my boots and sweaters. Had I listened to the majority of the people on all the Hawaii Facebook pages, I would be freezing right about now.

People ask all the time if they should bring their hoodies and boots and most of the time people tell them it's not worth it. Lots of people get rid of that stuff or put into storage because they don't think they will need it. I disagree, as I am sitting here on my front porch, in the shade, with the wind blowing between the houses, still cold wearing my Wear Blue hoodie.

It's not the same kind of cold I experienced in Ohio over Christmas, and it's still weird to be able to walk to and from school or Starbucks without being bundled up but for someone that gets cold easily, this is cold. I am glad to have my hoodies. I am glad to have socks and boots and not just flip flops, or slippahs as they are called here.

I may not have to wear a coat, or gloves, or a scarf, but without my hoodies I would be a popsicle. Acclimating is real. So if you ever have to move here or visit for an extended amount of time (3+ months), then I suggest bringing a couple sweaters or hoodies and some real shoes so your feet aren't cold once you get used to these temps. Plus, you'll want some socks and sneakers if you plan on doing any hiking so at least have those on hand. Nothing is quite as sucky as not having those things and having to buy them for island prices.

Now, don't get me wrong. I am not complaining. I hate snow, but I also hate sun and sand so I am thouroughly enjoying my Hawaii winter while half of the mainland is dealing with shoveling snow and frozen fingers. So, who wants to come for a visit?

Disclaimer

If you come here to read my Movie Reviews and you feel they are too vague, I want you to know I do that on purpose. I am by no means a real critic. Just your average movie watching mama. I hate reading reviews that give away half the plot and leave you with little surprises. This is also why I hate reading a book before seeing a movie... unless I read the book well in advance, then I don't remember what all happened so everything is new again LoL

Just know that my reviews are as honest as possible without revealing too much of the movie so that you may watch it without it being ruined. More often than not, I want you to check out the movie just so you can form your own opinion. I watch what I want because I think I might like it, so chances are my reviews are not going to be "I hated that, it was so bad, do not watch it." Actually, I would never tell anyone not to watch something. Everyone has differing opinions, so go out there and form your own. I, for one, would hate to miss out on a movie that everyone told me was horrible and come to find out it was just my style. Of course, how would I know I was missing out unless I actually went ahead and watched it despite the horrible reviews.

So, that's my disclaimer. I don't want to spoil anything for anyone that may be considering seeing a certain movie. I also don't want to tell anyone not to see something based on MY opinion of it. Never the less, I will put my opinion out there for anyone looking for a little more info on a movie before they go out and see it.

One more thing, there are quite a few times where I will say it's better to wait for DVD but that's only because I'm cheap and the movies are frickin' expensive!

Now, go watch a movie! Or read more of my blog... whatever you want to do, it's your choice :)

Movie Review Monday - A Day Late

I had wanted to revive Movie Review Monday but in all honesty, we haven't been watching that many movies. We are still trying to get caught up on our Tivo'd shows from over Christmas when we spent 3 weeks in Ohio away from all our shows. I did manage to catch up on 4 weeks of Days of Our Lives rather quickly, though ;)

Anyway, I was finally able to take the time to watch Away & Back. It's a Hallmark movie written by a friend (and her husband) that I met on a BabyCenter message board back in 2005. She is a great woman and an amazing writer. The Dyer team really has a broad range when it comes to writing and I cannot wait to see what they come up with in the future. Check out the movie Hysteria at some point, that was also written by the dynamic duo. Jonah Lisa, you really are amazing!

Now for my review!

I watched it in the middle of the day while the kids were at school because I was all caught up on the shows I could watch without my husband. The movie is rated PG and a family movie. It is about a family of swans that make their home near a family business. When an ornithologist comes to rescue the birds there is a bit of drama between her and the widowed father. The movie progresses nicely and leaves you feeling good about the world. The actors chosen were fantastic in their roles. It felt very real and normal, unlike a lot of feel good movies where everyone seems too nice or too perfect. Great movie all around.

My kids ended up watching it Friday night when my oldest was babysitting and my youngest liked it so much she wanted to watch it again on Saturday. So, it has the Sara Bear seal of approval! If you like movies like Free Willy, Dolphin Tale, or anything animal related, this is a good pick.

It should be playing again on the Hallmark Channel again so set your DVR, TiVo, or VCR so you can watch it on your own time without commercial interruptions. Or pop a squat when it comes on, pop some popcorn, and enjoy this new family favorite with your kids.

Slightly Offensive

Have you ever been sitting somewhere with a complete stranger, or even a semi-aquaintance like a fellow soccer mom, and said something that you know was tongue in cheek but the other person may not understand your humor?

I've run into such commentators from time to time. Whether it's in the grocery store or at the doctor's office or standing at my daughter's soccer practice tonight. I am sure what she said was not meant to be offensive, but I am slightly offended by her remark.

As we were there watching our girls practice, we were making conversation about various things. The subject of needing help with referee duties came up. She knew my daughter was certified and had asked if she could help out. I let her know that until I knew when u12 was playing, I wouldn't be able to give her a definite answer. As it was, my youngest son was playing at the same time as this team at a different location so I was already trying to figure out who could be where. She then says, matter of factly, "That's why everyone should just stick to single children." I sighed almost silently before responding, "Oh, that would make things so much easier, wouldn't it?"

Now, I am not one that becomes offended very easily but this woman doesn't really know me. And I don't really know her, so how am I to interpret what she is actually trying to convey? Was her comment made tongue in cheek? Does she look down on large families? Was she judging me for having five kids all playing soccer? I don't know her well enough to say which was her intention but I am leaning towards tongue in cheek. Still, she did not hesitate in her comment, she just blurted it out probably without thinking about her audience. Maybe that is her personality, again, I do not know.

Then, as conversations continued, she begins talking about her son's u8 team last year. She says, "So, we were at this game and the team across the way, all these crazy moms were wearing tutus that matched their kids' team colors! We were all looking at them like they were nuts!" Cue foot to mouth....

"Oh, that was MY SON'S team! I was one of those crazy moms wearing matching tutus and teeshirts." I was proud of the fact I could make her a tad bit uncomfortable realizing she was talking about me while I was sitting right there because I was not ashamed to be supporting my son's team, even if it was just a u8 game with no goalies.

She quickly added that they were a bit jealous that they didn't think of anything cool like that and the other moms suggested we get matching teeshirts made for this team. So, look for a bunch of crazy moms on the soccer field in a few weeks wearing matching teeshirts in support of a u10 team :)

Anyway, the point of my blog this evening is really that we should be mindful of what we say and who we say it in front of. I spent coutless grocery trips answering questions in the cereal aisle about whether all the children were mine (or all have the same father), "Oh, no, I just pick up random kids in the parking lot and take them shopping with me. Doesn't it look like fun? (and I don't know, but Little Johnny doesn't look much like his father, if you ask me."). And they asked if I was Mormom, Catholic, or knew what caused that, "Uh, no, no, and from the looks of it, no." And let's not forget the twins/triplets question when you have two or more close in age, "yes, they are triplets but one is still in an infant seat because she was the runt of the litter." These questions always come from complete strangers, or mere aquaintances, too. Your friends never question why you have so many kids, most of the time they don't even care how you manage to take care of them as long as you have wine and chocolate in the house when they come to visit.

It's my choice to have a houseful, err handful, of kids. It's my choice to be whatever religion I want, or don't want, and still reproduce like a fucking rabbit. It however isn't my choice to take them all out in public with me at the same time only to be bombarded with assinine questions regarding my religion, my sanity, and my sexual tendencies. Not really your business, Grandpa. Unless you need me to point you to the diaper aisle, stop asking me questions.

And for the love of all things holy, please do not make comments about soccer parents in front of soccer parents that you do not know because you just may be talking about that soccer parent sitting next to you (or someone they know). And never tell me how many kids I should have had... I'm not telling you to give your children a sibling or four or saying you should never have procreated in the first place. It's just kinda rude... and slightly offensive.

Soccer Saturday 2/7

Another weekend of bright and early soccer. Nothing like running around trying to find uniforms and water bottles and make sure we aren't forgetting anything at 8am on a Saturday.

We ran into construction on the way to the fields and ended up having to go down a few blocks and make a u-turn. This rail construction is just a pain in the ass because it goes right through the only road that leads to the soccer park. It caused quite a few people to be running late for their games. We were only about 10 minutes late, so it worked out alright.

Kadie had the 9am game. She played forward (or midfielder, not quite sure) the first quarter. She was amazing out there for the entire 12.5 minutes. It doesn't seem long, but that's a long time in soccer minutes. For being only 10 years old, she was impressing me (and her dad) with her decision making skills on the field. She put herself in the right positions and she didn't seem to hesitate on the field, like she usually does. There was one play where she ran up the middle while her teammate had the ball on the outside. Her teammate passed her the ball and without even thinking about it she shot at the goal! She didn't hesitate, she didn't situate her feet any different, she just kicked the ball... and she kicked it hard and accurately! SHE SCORED!!! It was pretty amazing. She sat out the 2nd quarter and went back in after halftime. She went in at defense. I told her not to let anything get past her and she didn't! Come the 4th quarter she was sitting again. Not quite sure why he would take her out. Maybe because she's one of the better girls on the team so he was giving the other girls more playing opportunities or maybe because she missed practice on Wednesday. As a coach, if I had to sit someone more than one quarter, I would probably choose anyone that missed a practice, to be honest. So, I guess I understand. Anyway, we were down 6-1 and ended up scoring twice in the 3rd quarter! I thought we were going to make a comeback but we just couldn't keep up the momentum in the 4th. They ended up losing 8-3 but it was a pretty well played game. And I was so proud of my baby!

Adam's game was right after Kadie's, on the same field, except we were on the opposite side. As we were moving our tents over and trying to find the stakes to keep them from blowing over, they blew over! Our new one was hard to get back up right but we did it without breaking anything. The old one, which wasn't as sturdy to begin with, ended up with a bent leg. It didn't seem to hurt it too bad as we were able to still use it and still take it down with no issues. Thankfully, that was the extent of our drama for the morning LoL

Adam began his game as goalie. That boy has some balls when he is in the goal, too. He may be little, but he is not afraid. He was running out to the ball even if the ball wasn't in the goalie's box. Thankfully he is smart enough not to pick it up when it's outside of those lines and he kicked it. He is also fast enough to get back into the goal. That could also be due to my screaming at him to get back into the goal LOL. The second time he came out of the box the opposing team recovered the ball quickly. A hard, high kick that I thought was going way over Adam's head. Adam ran back toward the goal, jumped JUST in time, and got his fingers on it. Sadly, he wasn't tall enough to bat it down and it bounced off his fingers into the goal. It was an amazing play all around though, and the only goal the opposing team scored. Adam didn't score at all, even though he tried really hard and took quite a few shots on goal. However, we did end up winning 7-1! Trying to teach a bunch of 9yr olds what the mercy rule is, wasn't exactly working. All they knew is that they wanted to score but after they were up by 5, they were supposed to just pass the ball around to each other to get that practice in. I kind of have a love-hate relationship with the mercy rule. On one hand, it doesn't discourage the other team. It allows for practice skills amongst the winning team. On the other hand, though, what are we teaching them? Are we teaching them that if they are worse than another team (or person) that they should have to stop being good just so we don't feel bad about ourselves? It seems a bit counterproductive to me. I understand why the rule is in place but at the same time, is it worth it?

Anyway, that makes Adam's team undefeated so far and Kadie's on a losing streak. Jacob didn't play this week and Lexi and Sara haven't started yet. Lexi has been helping us with our referee duties with little complaining after I offered to pay her. Everyone was asking why she wasn't the center ref at this last game we refereed because she is a good ref. She won't be able to help out much longer though since she will be starting her own games at some point and with games beginning at other regional parks, I just am not committing to staying out there longer than I need to. Lexi has already refereed for 3 games, and myself for 2 games. If the games are not at Waipio, I am not volunteering her. I have too many kids playing in too many different places for me to have to commit to spending more time outside of our region. I swear I'm not a soccer scrooge, I just need other parents to volunteer... oh, and the coach for my son's team because it's not my responsiility to referee. It was last year when I was the coach, but this year I am just the team mom dammit!

Next week we have at least one game at Waipio and another game around the same time in Pearl City. No idea when the third game is as we have not gotten the schedule update yet. I am so impatient. I need this info so I can figure out how my kids are getting where. Too bad Lexi can't drive yet ;)